Plane Rides and First Days.

When I bought my plane ticket, I didn’t notice that it was Air India (AI) from Newark to Frankfurt, and I also hadn’t heard about the horrific plane crash that occurred shortly before I made my purchase. Maybe that’s why the ticket was so much cheaper than all the other ones…
I got into the Newark airport and needed to check into Air India so I go to where all the ticket counters are… but their counter isn’t there. Hmm..
“Excuse me. Do you know where the Air India ticket counter is?” I ask a US Airways guy.
“Oh, they’re downstairs.”
What? I go downstairs and off in this corner surrounded by mobs of people wearing saris, salwars, and sandals is the Air India check in counter. I felt like I was going back in time. There were aisles to direct the lines to the counters, but not everyone was using them, so I took initiative and finally made my way up to the counter. I get my ticket, get to the gate, get on the plane, and my Air India flight begins. The flight I was taking was flying to Frankfurt and dropping people off before going to India, so I’m one of the five token white people on the plane. Everyone is speaking Hindi or some Indian dialect, the attendants are wearing saris, and the safety instructions are in Hindi/English, and I’m thinking, “I thought I was going to Europe. I freaking would end up on a plane like this.” It was great. Oh, and the best part was the Indian food for dinner. I ate aloo gobi and paneer with rice, and if you know what that is then I’m sure you’re jealous.
Another best part was getting a row of two seats to myself. It was just like hanging out on a loveseat. Best overnight flight ever.
As the plane was landing, I went through nearly the entire spectrum of emotions in a rapidly shifting cycle. Well, half the time I was so tired that I really wasn’t feeling anything. I was just looking out the window watching the world come closer. One of the things I noticed is that the Frankfurt area is like camouflage; it has little pockets of small villages surrounded by fields surrounded that are all connected. All the spaces in between are forests. But as I was looking out the window observing things such as this while thinking, “It’s all the same,” a shot of adrenaline suddenly jolted through my body.
“WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING?!?” I started freaking out- wanting to go back to Tucson with all my friends, family, and everything comfortable. After about a minute, though, I reminded myself, “Sarah, you have control over how you feel.” and the feelings calmed and eventually evolved into exhilaration, “ADVENTURE! YAY! BRING IT!”
All these feelings of anxiety turned tranquility turned excitement happened in a matter of minutes. I’m sure it was a sight to see for the Indian lady sitting near me. My face twisted with worry, nervously shifting my legs, wringing the end of the seat belt in my hands all suddenly relaxing to zen-like stillness and then to leg-kicking, bright eyed, smiling excitement.
The plane landed and I got into the airport. The first thing that I noticed was that every time I heard someone speaking German I had to stifle a giggle. It just seemed so silly. Ahhh, is this real? I can’t believe I’m here and those people are speaking in German. Hah.
I got my luggage and finally met up with Justin. Couldn’t have asked for a better person to hold my hand during this whole process. He’s really going out of his way to accommodate me. He picks me up from the airport, and we drive off to the Autobahn in his BMW named Betty. While going around a curve at 180 kmph I honestly thought to myself, “but I can’t die right now! I just got here!”
At one point during the ride home, there was a lull in conversation and I finally asked Justin,
“….Did I really just move here?”
“Well, when is your return flight?” he asked.
“Uhh, my flight was one-way.”
“Then, yes, you live here.”
“Holy crap.”
We get into town and the first thing we do is go to the top of a giant hill in Landstuhl so I can get the lay of the land… where there’s a red sandstone castle. At that point, I was so jetlagged that all I could think was, “Huh.. Cool. A castle.”
Then we went on base, and let me tell you about how this was one of the strangest days of my life. I start off in America, Tucson to be exact. Then I fly Air India, which basically means I went to India. THEN, I land in Europe. Whoa… but THEN it gets crazy.
We go onto base and DUDE. I went back to America. We went to the mall to pick up some stuff I needed, and first thing we do is walk into the food court with Taco Bell, Johnny Rockets, Subway, what have you. They even use dollars on base.
To sum it up, I traveled to three continents and back in ONE day. It was extremely disorienting, and I had a hard time interpreting what had just happened to me on top of the whole moving to Europe thing.
Dang.
So far it’s been quite a trip. I’ve been here three days, and a lot yet so little has happened. The first day was spent sleeping. 14 hours with a walk at five in the morning, which I must say was spectacular. I watched the first sunrise living in Germany sitting in a meadow in a charming little German village.
I mean, don’t get me wrong. It hasn’t all been great. I know one person, and I’m so happy that he’s here to help me out, but I still get sad when I think about all of it too much. I miss my desert and moving here has really made me question my direction in life. Not that I’m unhappy with the path I will eventually take, but this move has made me feel like I lack direction, at least for the moment. It’s telling me that security and stability in life isn’t so certain. I’ve disconnected myself from everything I know and starting new. It’s like my life is floating. Not attached to anything, but still grasping at what was and soon will be. But right now it’s just me, this new place, and this waitressing job. I’ve never even been a server for christ’s sake.. What if I don’t like it? Then, shiiiit.
And yes, I have been worrying. About what, you ask? Everything, duh. What if I don’t like this job? I need to find a place but I want to get a place but I need to have a car because I’m staying in this village 14 km away and can’t find a place because I can’t get anywhere and am dependent on Justin to get places but he works aaall the time except for Monday and Tuesday but he’s planning other things and I need to get going but he doesn’t seem to think it’s an issue but what about when I start my job and I want to travel a bit but I’m worried about money because I haven’t saved up much and need to pay rent for WHEN I get my place and I want to have one by the time Ariel gets here because hosting one person is one thing, but when you get two…… and what if I don’t like this job? What if I suck at it?
It goes on and on. Over and over.
And then I go on a walk in the beautiful village and calm down because it’s so AWESOME and I really don’t need to worry at all. Whew.
But today I’m hanging out at the base while Justin is working. Got here at 3pm and am going to be here til 2am. At least I’m here with people and have gotten the layout of Chili’s. It really doesn’t seem that hard. People are hungry. You see what they want. You get them what they want, and they give you money. Not a bad deal.
But I’m not sure I can make it to 2am. We’ll see how it goes
Now that I’ve been here a few days, I’m starting to remember what it’s like to move. The flashbacks keep comin to the last time I moved, which was Tucson (obviously) almost eight years ago. The aspect of moving that I’m reflecting on now is finding and making friends. People need people, right? I mean, normal people need people, and when you move to a new place, more often than not you don’t know any of those. I had forgotten how friendship making is so different when you’re new to a place. You’re not as picky. Someone shows up that you even just sort of get along with, and you try it out, sometimes knowing that in a different situation you might not do the same. That sounds really shallow, but it also has amazing potential to broaden yourself because you put yourself out there for people you wouldn’t do otherwise if you were say, already hanging out with people you’ve known for years and happy about it. Like, “Eh, she was cool, but I’ve already got my friends from five hundred years back so I don’t really feel the need to try to make thaaat work.” It’s not that you don’t like them, it’s just that... meh. *shrugs*
I’m also reflecting on the evolution of friendships in a new setting. Of course you’re going to meet a bunch of people, and of course you’re going to hang out with them so you can get to know them. I’m thinking about the last time I moved, though, where the first people who showed interest in me turned out to be pretty mean girls. The whole girls gone wild drama drama gossip gossip. I hated it. Then, I moved on to someone else and that didn’t work out. I tried out a few people after that and after a while finally found someone I resonated with. The point is, I had forgotten about the friendship “trials” you go through before finding the right person to spend your time with. Up til then, I’m gonna try and hang out with a girl I met last night whose three weeks new to the area. We’ll see where it goes.